Desperate Housewives - Connect! Connect!

As the episode title suggests, last night's Desperate Housewives was all about connecting:

Edie and Susan, and Bree and Alex, and Lynnette and her mother, and Gabby and her kids.

That's a lot of connecting.

The episode started with a disconnection picking up with where last week's story ended--Dave walking down Wisteria Lane, suitcases in hand after being thrown out by Edie.

Who WALKS to a hotel? I mean--REALLY!

I'm sure the writers were stuck with coming up with a way for Dave's path to cross with Mike Delfino, who offers to let Dave stay with him after hearing about his fight with Edie.

But seriously, who WALKS to a hotel? Especially given how few hotels would actually be in walking distance in surburbia...

The women all gather to support Edie in her time of need. Edie isn't upset that Dave was married before, but that he neglected to mention it--especially after she laid her entire life out for him. "Emphasis on the word LAID," snarks Gaby.

But everyone is distracted from commiserating with poor Edie when Susan announces that she needs Edie to put her house on the market because she's moving in with Jackson. This puts Edie in a snit which complicates matters when she and Susan are accidentally locked in the basement of the house Andrew and Alex are moving in to.

This was at least more believably handled than Dave's exodus to a hotel à pied.

Although Susan's reaction to Edie's bruised ego was more a bit out of character: "I thought we gave your latest breakup the three seconds it deserved." Okay, Mayer--taking Edie lessons?

While trapped together, Edie dissects Susan's relationship history to prove her point that Susan is incapable of being without a man. Susan counters with the fact that Edie has probably been with over a thousand men. "Okay--I enjoyed the 80s!" Edie shrugs.

Edie reveals to Susan that when she was young, her father left her mother--and stole her horse figurine collection to give to his new girlfriend's little girl. Of course, this story makes Susan weepy--but as she tries to sympathize, Edie slaps her. So Susan pushes Edie, causing her to topple into a bunch of boxes and hurt herself.

The two are finally rescued when the exterminator shows up to check the rat traps. Edie tells Susan if she ever repeats the story about the horse collection, she will kill her.

That I'd like to see...

The time spent trapped in the basement not only forges a bond between the two rivals, but causes Edie to re-evaluate her relationship with Dave--asking him to come back home, and Susan to re-evaluate her relationship with Jackson--choosing to be alone in Fairview over moving to be with Jackson.

Another relationship underwent a re-evaluation during the episode: Bree was called on her behavior by her future son-in-law, Alex--who accuses her of emasculating Orson. This escalates into a power struggle between the two which culminates in Alex telling Bree that he's not interested in her generous gift of a house for him and Andrew.

Bree tries to get Andrew to run interference but Andrew tells her that Alex is not her husband or son or employee. "Not everyone has to listen to you," he explains to his flummoxed mother. Bree finally realizes that her bossiness due to her business is getting out of control. "I need someone to call me out..." she tells Alex and offers him that job.

Bree's not the only housewife dealing with "listening" problems: Gaby can't get Celia and Juanita to obey her when Carlos leaves for a business trip. At her wits end, the handyman gives her some advice, "Fear is the foundation of all good parenting."

When Carlos arrives back home, he finds the girls doing all sorts of chores. He's thrilled that they're helping their mommy, until Juanita explains that their motivation was because "The scary man told us we had to."

A bit of motherly manipulation in the Scavo household as well. When one of Stella's nursing home neighbors rats her out to Lynnette, Lynnette confronts her mother as to Porter's whereabouts. Angry that her daughter stuck her in the nursing home and rarely visits, Stella refuses to tell Lynnette where Porter is. "The last time I came you threw pudding at me!" says Lynnette defensively.

On her way back from the nursing home, Lynnette is in tears as she talks with Tom (No hands-free laws in Fairview, obviously...) and we are led to believe that Lynnette has been in a car accident. Actually, the cars in front of her collided which led her to think it could have BEEN her in the accident, which led her to come up with the scheme to tell Stella she was in a car accident.

This flushes Porter out of hiding as he and Stella rush to the hospital. Lynnette reveals that it was a trick and convinces him to go to court--just in time to save them from losing their bail bond money and the restaurant. She also mends fences with Stella tellling her that if she behaves better, she'll visit more often and even bring the kids.

Finally, while separated briefly from Edie, Dave finalizes his revenge on Mike. Have you figured it out? My guess is that Dave plans to take someone Mike loves away from him, the way he believes Mike took what he loved (his wife Lila and daughter Paige) away from him. And that someone would be Katherine.

Dave witnessed Katherine testing the waters with Mike when she told him how Dylan wanted her to move to Baltimore to be closer to her and her grandkid. Mike's non-commital response upsets her and causes Dave to believe that Mike is still in love with Susan.

But later, Mike admits that he's falling in love with Katherine (I'm guessing the writers think it'd be easier to write Dana Delaney out of the show than Teri Hatcher. Bummer...). He even sends her a huge bouquet of red roses with a note that reads "Don't Go."

Ah--but if Dave has anything to say about it, the lovely Katherine will indeed be leaving Wisteria Lane and Mike's life.

Permanently.