Desperate Housewives - What More Do I Need?

Susan and Jackson continued the clean slate on their romance by going back to the beginning--starting with the first date. This means poor Jackson is subjected to Susan's incessant babbling and the a listing of her least favorite words (panties, larva and chunks). It also means holding off on sex until date number four.

So Jackson channels his sexual frustration and unblocks his artistic creativity by starting a painting of Susan. Susan shows up after their third date in some slutty lingerie hoping to convince Jackson that it's date number four. When she sees the painting, she is touched at how well Jackson knows her.

Lynette and Tom confront Porter about the MILF and order him to end the relationship. Porter agrees but tells them they can't tell Anne Schilling that they know about the affair. Tom agrees to Porter's terms--but at the next PTA meeting, Lynette is overcome with rage at the hypocritical cougar and attacks her in the bathroom. (Pretty sad excuse for a catfight, though--Marc Cherry should have watched some Dynasty re-runs!) Turns out Anne Schilling is pregnant, so she and Porter make plans to run away together.

Although life as Virginia Hildebrand's surrogate family is pretty sweet for a while, it doesn't take long before Gaby is creeped out by the old woman's attentions--especially after Virginia tells her kids to call her "Grandma." Gaby tells the creepy old lady off and Viriginia turns around and gets Carlos fired from his job at the country club.

Ida and her sister Roberta continue their detective work on Dave Williams. Roberta finds out that Dr. Heller has been making regular calls to Dave--and that he's a psychiatrist specializing in treating the criminally insane. They try getting more info from the doctor himself--but Dr. Heller is one smart cookie and doesn't fall for their ruse. He does find out, however, that Dave is in Fairview--and makes travel arrangements to go there himself.

The best storyline was Orson and Bree--whose decision to fire a light-fingered employee named Charlie backfires. Turns out the surveillance tape that caught Charlie dipping into the petty cash also caught Orson and Bree having sex in the kitchen--and that tape is in the hands of Charlie! Charlie blackmails Bree who is vehemently opposed to paying him. Andrew tells her that her options regarding the tape are limited: "First, you need to decide what your porn names are gonna be."

Bree gives Andrew carte blanche to handle the situation and he brings back the disk. "It's kind of amazing what you can get a bunch of bikers to do when you buy them a case of beer!" As it turns out, the disk doesn't have Bree and Orson on it--but Mike and Katherine! "Just so you know, I'm never eating anything that's coming out of that kitchen again..." Andrew says.

Andrew had the best lines in last night's episode...

Bree confronts Katherine with the disk--and warns her that Susan might not reacts well when she finds out that Katherine is involved with her ex.

Looks like Susan might be finding out in next week's episode...