Desperate Housewives - Opening Doors

Last night the biggest secret was revealed on Desperate Housewives: Ida's cat LIVES! Although Toby is prone to wanderlust that has McCluskey trying to track him down. Bree offers to help and is advised, "If you do find him, don't look him in the eye. It angries him up."

The episode also featured the return of Bob and Lee--still dreadfully underutilized--in a scheme by Gabby to ascertain whether or not new boarder Elly (Justine Bateman) is a hooker. Loved the way Bob and Lee bickered over who was butch enough to take on the role. "If you're looking for butch, you should know I played Tony in West Side Story," offers Lee. Lee gets the part and approaches Elly dressed in a leather jacket. "He looks like the lost member of Wham!,"Gabby cries to Bob. Elly kicks the @#$% out of Bob and tells Gabby she's a tattoo artist trying to earn enough money to open her own shop. As it turns out, it's not tattoos she's giving male clients, but cocaine.

Susan runs into ex Karl with his hot, young new wife at Lamaze class. Jealous of Karl's seemingly perfect life with seemingly perfect wife, she tries to get Mike to go along with her scheme to be seemingly perfect as well. "Hence the jacket," Mike cracks. "Hence! That's classy. Say a lot of "hence" when you see him!" says Susan. Unfortunately, Mike spills the beans about his addiction and recovery, much to Susan's chagrin. It ends up being Karl who reminds her that Mike will probably be there for her while he wasn't.

Bree and Orson are in the midst of dividing up community property. Orson tries to get Bree to consider reconciliation. Bree says she will, if he demonstrates remorse for his actions by turning himself in to the police. Turns out Orson values his freedom more than his relationship with Bree. When he shows up later, drunk and pleading, Bree asks Edie to take him back to his hotel. Orson begs Edie, "Don't make me go back--the divorced men are starting a book club!" Edie takes pity on him and lets him crash on her sofa. When Bree finds out, she is upset and asks Edie to not let it happen again. Edie is offended by the remark about her "picking at other women's leftovers," so to spite Bree, she encourages Orson to stay and in a martini-induced moment, the two share a kiss--which is witnessed by Bree.

Speaking of spiteful, how about that demon seed of Tom Scavo? Little Kayla is most likely the biggest bitch on Wisteria Lane--bigger than Katherine Mayfair even. Turns out that while the twins actually set the fire that burned down Rick's restaurant, Kayla was the brains behind the whole thing. When Lynette finds out, she and Tom argue about getting Kayla into therapy. Lynette goes behind Tom's back and takes Kayla to a shrink, but the evil spawn threatens to go to the police and reveal the twins involvement in the arson and so Lynette is thwarted. Kayla goes on to demonstrate her diabolical powers by convincing the twins (admittedly ,not the brightest bulbs) to jump off the roof using an umbrella as a parachute. One of them does and ends up breaking an arm. It looks like there's going to be a "Carrie" type showdown between Lynette and the devil's daughter coming up for the season finale...

Oh, and the final secret revealed--Dylan admits to Katherine that she's been sneaking around seeing her Dad. Of course, Katherine already knows this because she's been doing some sneaking of her own--spying on Dylan to get the goods on the "boy" she's been dating. When Dylan breaks the news to Katherine, she is scarily calm. "I knew this day was coming and I prepared myself." Katherine tells Dylan. Dylan brings Wayne in for a face-to-face with Katherine. Katherine sends Dylan upstairs and tells Wayne, "I'm not scared of you anymore." I thought there might be a gun behind the counter, but it turned out that Katherine was kneading dough. Then later it turned out I was right--there was a gun in the kitchen drawer just waiting. Guess that's what Katherine meant by being "prepared."