Blackmail, Bribery and Bombshells on Desperate Housewives

Secrets kept, secrets revealed on last night's episode of Desperate Housewives. The cleverest piece of writing came with a blackmail/bribery round robin that started when Mike witnessed a certain Sylvia showing up at Adam Mayfair's house while he was working on the plumbing. Apparently Sylvia is what happened in Chicago--a former patient with serious mental problems who ruined his life (or so Adam says). He asks Mike not to tell Katherine about the visit. Mike in turn asks Adam if he can write him a prescription (his drug dealer Barrett won't supply a new batch until he pays up the money he owes him...). Adam balks saying that an ob/gyn writing a prescription for a male raises red flags. (Do they have the specialty on prescription pads? I'm looking at a prescription right now and it doesn't say "endocrinologist" on it...) Mike says it's OK--the favor doesn't have to work both ways.

Which leads Adam to show up at Orson's office (following on the heels of a naughty tryst with Bree who is trying to keep their sex life alive while she creates a "family bed" for Benjamin. Blatant double entendre: Orson saying "Your phone message said you had a cavity that needed filling" as he revs up the dentist drill...) to ask Orson for a favor--right after a brief reminder about delivering Danielle's baby. Orson then ends up giving the prescription to Mike--but not without a lecture about the dangers of drug addiction. Mike takes the prescription and reminds Orson that his pain comes from being run over by a hit-and-run driver. And so it comes full circle. Although I wonder why Mike just didn't blackmail Orson in the first place...

Mike's drug addiction causes an unexpected problem at home when Susan (finally padded to look pregnant!) meets his pre-med drug dealer Barrett and, not realizing what his connection to Mike is, thinks he would be a superior catch for daughter Julie instead of the multi-pierced guy she's dating now. When Mike sees Barrett in his home, he outs the drug dealer who in turn outs Mike. Susan explains to Julie that Mike had an issue with a dependence on pain meds, but that it was under control now. Julie tells Susan that she saw Mike earlier at the pharmacy getting a prescription filled. Later, Susan secretly watches as Mike sneaks out to pop a pill from his stash in his car.

Speaking of problems at home, Bree's focus on new baby Benjamin causes a rift with Andrew who feels that his mother thinks he's a mistake. "Does the mistake have a soul?" he queries plaintively, but it goes right over Bree's head. When asked by Tom Scavo how things are going with the new arrival, Bree tells him that "The three of us are such a happy little family!" and Andrew who overhears her feels left out. He ends up moving out of the house--to give Bree and the baby space--and Bree is devastated. She shows up at his dingy apartment with a home-cooked meal to try and woo him back home, but Andrew thinks it's time he was out on his own. He even thanks her for the time she dumped him at the side of the road saying that it forced him to grow-up. And then he says, "Mom, would you mind using a coaster?" and fussbudget Bree replies, "Now I'm really going to cry!"

Another mother-and-child reunion occurred when Lynette finally tracked down the irascible Stella. On a tip from her beloved stepfather Glen, she corners Stella and asks her to come back home with her. Lynette has blamed her mother for years for driving away the only stable male influence in her and her sisters' lives by cheating on Glen years ago. Glen drops a bombshell by telling Lynette that it wasn't why he left--he is gay. (Ironic as Richard Chamberlain aka Dr. Kildare and Ralph de Bricassart finally revealed that HE was gay in a 2003 autobiography. My Mom said he was gay YEARS before that. Humph--Mom was right. Go figure...) This revelation changes Lynette's feelings about the past, but Stella doesn't want to ruin the good relationship they built during Lynette's illness. Problem solved when Glen invites Stella to come live with him and they all lived happily ever after! Until next episode...

But the biggest bombshell came in the ongoing saga of Gabby, Carlos and Victor. Carlos kept insisting that he and Gabby go to the police, but Gabby was deadset against it. Even after Edie calls in an anonymous tip to the police about Carlos and Gabby having an affair while she was married to Victor. Gabby goes as far as to drug Carlos to prevent him from spilling the beans. But when the police show up at the door to announce that they've found Victor washed up on shore and now unconscious in the hospital, Gabby rushes to the hospital to do damage control. Fortunately for her, Victor tells the police he can't remember anything that happened after his Friday staff meeting. The police and doctor leave his room and that's when he springs it on Gabby--he remembers EVERYTHING. A little blackmail to keep Mrs. Lang in line until he wins the Governorship? Hmmmm...